This week has been positive and negative regarding marriage in Taiwan. The military’s annual joint wedding ceremonies scheduled for Friday are to include two same-sex couples — a first for Taiwan since same-sex marriage was legalized in May last year.
However, the age-old problem of women being mistreated by their in-laws continues, and a petition has been launched to enact legislation to prevent such treatment after it allegedly led to a suicide in August.
The woman left behind an Internet post that included the phrase: “My mother-in-law killed me.”
Same-sex marriage in the military is especially welcome news, as three couples who had signed up last year eventually withdrew from the ceremony due to “public pressure and individual reasons,” according to the Liberty Times (the Taipei Times’ sister newspaper).
Even though many Internet users congratulated the couples when they announced their participation, there were also derogatory remarks, including those who questioned the ability of gay men to defend the nation.
It is unfortunate, and if this “pressure” was serious enough to cause all three couples to change their decision, it is clear that public prejudices have yet to catch up with the law.
This is a big reason that the LGBT Pride Parade, which is to take place on Saturday, is still hugely important, and advocates have said that legalization was just the beginning.
Legalization gives many the illusion that LGBTQ equality has been achieved, but a poll released in May showed otherwise: Many items showed low percentages, including less than half who could accept their child being gay.
It is important that the government continues to lead by example, and especially the military, where such matters are generally more sensitive. In South Korea, for example, homosexual activity remains illegal, not to mention the widely reported discrimination and harassment that LGBTQ soldiers there suffer.
Even though many Taiwanese soldiers remain afraid to come out to their peers, and discrimination undoubtedly exists, at least the military establishment is accepting about same-sex marriage. Change takes time and this is a marked improvement.
However, even with the right to marry, it is not easy to maintain a marriage. Women being mistreated by in-laws has become a hot topic, and a petition to enact legislation to curb such behavior reached the threshold of 5,000 signatures on Monday to elicit an official response.
The petition said that women are still subject to the outdated and patriarchal attitude that they belong to their husband’s family, and often the husband sides with his parents and tells his wife to just bear with it.
As more women take to Internet forums to complain, a quick search shows countless posts made in the past few months. In the more serious cases, women develop mental issues, such as post-traumatic stress disorder, while some commit suicide.
Again, societal values need to change, but like LGBTQ equality, that would take time.
However, if there can be legislation against bullying and domestic violence, there can also be laws to regulate the behavior of in-laws to at least give them an idea of what is acceptable.
It is easy to tell LGBTQ people to just come out to their parents, and for abused daughters-in-law and their husbands to simply fight back, but traditional family values and other extenuating circumstances persist. The government has until Dec. 25 to respond to the petition and it will be interesting to see what it says.
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