Betting was the name of the game this week in Taiwan-related news with several figures making plays against all the odds.
The first person to fancy his chances was US President Barack Obama. He took a big gamble, staking his reputation on the notion that those increasingly belligerent bullies in Beijing wouldn’t get too upset if he folded his hand and fobbed off Taiwan with upgrades to its aging fleet of F-16A/Bs — rather than the new F-16C/D jets so desperately wanted by the Taiwanese military.
Some hope, given Obama’s recent losing streak.
When is Uncle Sam going to learn that however it plays its hand, it is impossible to win when playing high-stakes games with one’s banker?
Meanwhile, politicos and military men in Taiwan hedged their bets by playing down their disappointment at the news they were not getting brand new jets. Instead, they pinned their hopes on obtaining the Boeing Dreamliner of the military world — the F-35.
You may laugh, but the bean-counters in the financially strapped US would do well to remember that those in charge of Taipei’s arms procurement are like children in a candy shop when it comes to buying US weapons. Washington could easily recoup some of the billions it has blown on the disastrously over-budget F-35 project by overcharging Taiwan for a few of these big-ticket birds.
Meanwhile, Democratic Progressive Party Chairperson Tsai Ing-wen (蔡英文) was in the US betting her bottom dollar that a good showing on Capitol Hill would boost her election chances. However, she did not bet on a disgruntled US National Security Council member stabbing her in the back before she had even left the table.
Also staking a claim was People First Party (PFP) Chairman James Soong (宋楚瑜), who took a chance when he revealed his running mate, a real dark horse and political novice, university professor Lin Ruey-shiung (林瑞雄). Soong’s move smacked of a political gambler chancing his arm with a last throw of the dice, but according to polls the wily old punter has upped the ante sufficiently to make January’s presidential election something more than a two-horse race. However, Soong is still firmly at the back of the pack.
Meanwhile, poker-faced President Ma Ying-jeou (馬英九) placed his bet on winning the youth vote by extending the period young people can pay back student loans to a maximum of 43 years — which means PhDs could theoretically still be repaying student loans well into their 70s.
If Ma really wanted to help the poor, why not just let the KMT foot the bill with its ill-gotten assets — as it most probably did for his own expensive overseas education?
However, this week’s biggest gambler was a young man named Lin Hao-chin (林昊縉).
Lin, who until recently was an assistant manager at Taiwan Sport Lottery Corp, allegedly decided to get back at Fubon Bank after being overlooked for a promotion by breaking into the lottery system and placing bets on the results of games that had already finished.
He won, of course, and then blew the loot on romantic holidays with his girlfriend. His alleged antics only came to light after the press got hold of the story.
The amazing thing about Lin’s case is not that he was caught, but that the bank did not report his crimes to the authorities, deciding instead to cover it up as they didn’t want to “ruin his future.”
With morals like that, I’m willing to wager that the only “future” available to someone like Lin — once he gets out of jail — would be a career in politics.
Joe Doufu is a Taipei-based satirist.
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