My shoulders are hunched, my palms are sweaty and my systolic blood pressure has just passed 170 -- about the level found in fighter pilots' flying training missions. But this isn't a war zone; this is morning rush hour on the A360. The driver behind me blasts his horn and my pulse rate jumps another few notches. I feel stomach cramps coming on.
I have exactly seven minutes to get to my meeting and all I can see is a stationary line of cars stretching ahead. I slump over the steering wheel, the will to live just about lost.
According to occupational health expert David Lewis, I am now suffering from acute stress. "All the signs are there," he says. "Raised blood pressure, tense posture, excess stomach acid. Because of the noise, aggression and obstacles around you, your body is flooding with the hormones adrenaline and cortisol, preparing you to fight or flee. Unfortunately, you can neither flee nor fight when you are sat in traffic, so all that stress is bottled up."
But could this drive have long-term effects on my health, my work and my home life? Are the millions of people who drive to work every day doing themselves any lasting damage?
Lewis thinks so. As we crawl, at about 8kph, across Hammersmith Bridge, he says: "Every minute spent in heavy traffic impacts on every other aspect of a person's life. Many people waste hours in the office every week while they do little more than recover from the stress of their commute. After the drive back home, they may be so tense that they drink more than they should, act aggressively towards loved ones or have trouble sleeping."
The UK's roads are packed. There are around 32 million licensed cars in the UK, compared with 9 million in 1961. Traffic flows have increased by one-fifth in the past 10 years and continue to rise by 1 percent to 2 percent a year.
It all equals a growing public health problem. In one study in which Lewis was involved, drivers dealing with heavy traffic were found to have similar systolic blood pressure -- up to 180 from a resting rate of 120 -- to that of fighter pilots and police taking part in simulated riots.
"Fighter pilots and riot police are trained to deal with their stressful environments, whereas drivers are not," Lewis says.
We reach Hammersmith roundabout at around 9am. A motorbike darts in front of me, causing me to brake hard. I use my horn to (gently) remind the rider that his manoeuvre was dangerous.
Lewis says the density of traffic around me explains why my breathing has become quick and shallow and why I can feel palpitations in my chest.
"Your stress spirals in any situation where you are not in control. Driving is paradoxical because you feel you have a lot of control over your car, but in fact your speed and trajectory are strictly regulated by other traffic," he says.
"You have put yourself under clock pressure by setting a time for the meeting, but it is outside forces that determine whether you get there on time," Lewis says.
And they have determined that I should be late. At the red lights, I creep forward to close the 30mm gap between me and the car in front.
Lewis, a fellow of the International Stress Management Association, points to my hands, which are fidgeting on the steering wheel and to my legs, which are shaking slightly. He tells me that many drivers are so used to these kinds of symptoms -- as well as more serious ones such as dizziness and nausea -- that they barely notice them any longer.
He judges my symptoms and says I am suffering "average to high" levels of commuter stress. He then makes me feel no better at all by listing some of the health problems I could be storing up. Depression, anxiety, a lowered immune system, obesity and high blood pressure are all by-products of stress. As are lowered productivity and concentration at work; plus loss of libido and a short temper at home.
Stress accounts for an estimated 12.8 million lost working days a year in the UK and costs businesses at least ?4 billion (US$7 billion). It is difficult to measure how much of this can be put down to commuting, but in one study 44 percent of drivers named rush-hour traffic as the most stressful aspect of their lives.
Of course, people have to get to work somehow, and every method of commuting comes with its own trials and tribulations. At least in a car you have a degree of personal space that you don't have on a packed commuter train.
But Graham Lucas, adviser in mental health at Priory Healthcare, believes driving causes more health problems than any other aspect of working life.
"One fact often overlooked is that while sat in a car, especially when stressed, a person tends to hunch their shoulders," he says. "This causes neck, back and joint problems, which are among the biggest causes of days off work."
So far, so depressing. But the good news is that there are ways in which we can reduce the impact of our daily drive. Lewis believes employers should allow more working from home and more flexible working, so not everyone is on the road at the same time. "Employers will lose out otherwise," he says. "Invaluable employees are walking away from good jobs purely because of the pressures of their commute."
I am finally approaching my destination. One psychologist I talked to said that on our combative roads, drivers are now divided into two equally undesirable types: the anxious and the angry.
So which, I ask Lewis, am I?
"Well, you were verbally abusive, but more often you were just on edge. I think you're a mix of the two," he says.
Great: the worst of both worlds.
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