The nuclear-tipped enmity between India and Pakistan has produced a half-century of warfare, vicious political discourse and countless skirmishes -- some deadly, some petty.
But when things get personal, the situation changes quickly. India and Pakistan may feud over religion and nationalism, but the 1.02 billion Indians and 146 million Pakistanis share an ancient history, a common culture and a colonial albatross.
"We are a part of them, they are a part of us," said Irfan Chaudhry, 28, a Pakistani businessman in the city of Lahore. "The Indian culture, their traditions, the way they live, the way they speak, the way they deal with people -- everything is similar to us."
The past few weeks have seen enormous steps toward peace: Talks have been announced, travel links have been reopened and even Kashmir -- the bloody, beautiful Himalayan region claimed by both countries but divided between them -- will be part of the negotiations.
Across the region, there's hope -- cautious given the many false starts of the past -- that a new era is at hand.
The modern history of the Indian subcontinent was born in bitterness and bloodshed. In 1947, when British colonial India was given independence, it came with a partition that carved overwhelmingly Muslim Pakistan from largely Hindu India. Sectarian savagery killed more than 1 million people and uprooted millions more.
But the ties survived, because minus the religious component, these are two peoples who share far more than what divides them.
There are nearly as many Muslims in India as there are in Pakistan. Urdu, the main language of Pakistan, is just a few small linguistic steps from Hindustani, the colloquial language of much of India.
The two nations share the heritage of British colonialism. English is the language of diplomacy. Intellectuals on both sides speak it with the cadence of Oxford scholars. Cricket, that most English of sports, is both countries' favorite. Both countries model their legal and parliamentary systems on Britain's.
Actually going from one country to another, though, has long been a challenge, requiring creativity and often plenty of money. Until the recent peace initiatives eased border restrictions, the trip took nearly a full day of travel, and changing planes in the Persian Gulf.
Direct flights only resumed on Jan. 1, bus service a couple months earlier. The first cross-border train went through in the middle of this month.
But even the most liberal of border-crossers carry decades of emotional baggage.
"With all your so-called open mind and liberal attitudes ... somehow when you land in the space called Pakistan, you realize you're still a hostage to the brainwashing you've had for almost 54 years, of being in `enemy territory,'" said Mahesh Bhatt, an Indian movie director known for sexually charged films and liberal views.
When they do get to visit each other, they can expect a warm welcome.
During the last brief spell of detente, in July 2001, Pakistani President General Pervez Musharraf added a poignant touch to his New Delhi visit by dropping by the mansion where his family lived until the subcontinent was partitioned.
Filmmaker Bhatt, whose mother was Muslim and father Hindu, recently made his first trip across the border. What he got in Pakistan were warm receptions by everyone from government communications officials to hotel waiters to aspiring actors who stopped him on the street to ask about work.



