Sat, Sep 26, 2009 - Page 8 News List

JOHNNY NEIHU'S NEWS WATCH: Now this will hurt Chicom feelings

By Johnny Neihu 強尼內湖

Pop Quiz: How do you take a documentary that nobody was interested in, by an unknown director, about a woman most people have never heard of, and turn it into the one of the world’s most talked-about movies?

Well, dear reader, for the answer you’ll have to delve deep into the echelons of Chicom Central. When you get there, I suspect you’ll have to push your way past a despairing Hollywood director or two asking for Zhongnanhai’s advice on how best to promote the latest Matthew McConaughey/Jennifer Aniston summer rom-com.

By now most of us are aware that China got its knickers in an industrial-sized twist last month when the Melbourne International Film Festival invited Uighur activist Rebiya Kadeer to attend the festival opening and screening of The 10 Conditions of Love, a doco by Jeff Daniels (not the Michigan-based actor) about her life.

Apparently Australia really “hurt the feelings of the Chinese people” by hosting Kadeer (Beijing accuses her of inciting unrest in her home territory, Xinjiang), but then our Antipodean friends would not be the first nation or organization to upset this fair island’s overly sensitive neighbors.

Earlier this month in a piece on the Asia Sentinel Web site, a great article revealed how a Chinese blogger and journalism master’s degree candidate at Peking University, Fang Kecheng (方可成), checked the online archive of the Chicom rag People’s Daily dating back to the founding of the People’s Republic to work out exactly how many times the Chinese had had their feelings hurt.

Fang and friends worked out that China’s feelings had been officially hurt at least 140 times by a minimum of 42 countries and several organizations since Mao Zedong’s (毛澤東) bandits came to power in 1949, the most recent example being the Aussies and their dastardly act of showing a 55-minute documentary.

I, for one, am curious how the Chicoms can be so certain that the people have had their feelings trampled on — it’s not as if they regularly ask the proletariat for their opinion on issues of importance. I doubt that a large portion of China’s population have even heard of Kadeer, let alone the documentary, so how they all managed to become emotionally disturbed by its existence is beyond me.

Nevertheless, by making such a Mount Everest out of a mole hill and revealing the extent to which their feelings were hurt, the Chicoms inadvertently provided my pro-independence buddies in Taiwan with plenty of fodder with which to rock the good ship SS Harmonious Cross-Strait Relations.

No sooner had the Melbourne fuss died down than the Kaohsiung Film Festival announced it would show the Kadeer doco “to promote arts and culture” in the city.

Yeah, right.

Add this to the recent visit by the Dalai “wolf in monk’s clothing” Lama, and therapists in China must be exhausted from working overtime these last few weeks.

Now, Freddy Lim (林昶佐), the singer from “black metal” band Chthonic (warning: Don’t stand directly in front of me when I try to pronounce this word) traveled to Washington this week to personally invite Kadeer — also known as Osama bin Hitler in Chinese Nationalist Party (KMT) circles, if Kaohsiung City Councilor May Zai-hsin (梅再興) is to be believed — to Taiwan in December.

Freddy, by the way, is also the head of the delightfully named civic group Guts United Taiwan, which as well as having a cool name is also one of the few organizations whose name is its own acronym.

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