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Obama and Clinton appear together on `The Colbert Report' 歐巴馬和希拉蕊現身「柯伯報告」

Senator Hillary Rodham Clinton takes part in a comedy sketch on Comedy Central’s The Colbert Report with Stephen Colbert, right, in Philadelphia on April 17, 2008. 四月十七日，參議員希拉蕊．蘿涵．柯林頓在費城參與喜劇中心頻道的「柯伯報告」喜劇短劇，和主持人史帝芬．柯伯（右）同台演出。 照片：美聯社 PHOTO: AP

Democratic White House hopefuls turned into a comedy tag-team earlier this month when Hillary Clinton, Barack Obama and former candidate John Edwards all appeared on a satirical news show.

A commanding Clinton came on the set of Comedy Central’s The Colbert Report to fix a malfunctioning projection screen.

“Senator Clinton, you’re so prepared for any situation,” gasped Stephen Colbert, host of the show.

“I just love solving problems. Call me anytime. Call me at 3am,” Clinton said. She was referring to the much-talked-about campaign ad portraying her as prepared to receive a late-night crisis call at the White House.

Later, Colbert lamented, “I only wish Senator Obama could have joined us,” as the Illinois senator popped up in a live feed on the screen above his desk.

“Senator Obama, won’t Senator Clinton be happy that she fixed our screen?” Colbert deadpanned.

Obama went on to complain of “manufactured political distractions,” such as journalists questioning why he doesn’t usually wear an American flag lapel pin.

“I think the American people are tired of these games,” Obama said.

“Speaking for the news media, we are not tired of it,” Colbert said. “It allows us to ask the same questions over and over again, and we don’t have to do any work.”

In another surprise appearance, former candidate John Edwards walked on set after Colbert complained that white men “have no one to represent them.”

“Finally, America’s white men are being heard, and the candidates are attempting to address issues important to them,” Colbert said. He then showed pictures of Clinton having a beer, Obama bowling and Republican John McCain apparently napping.

Edwards said he would vote for whoever best advocates universal health care — or buys him a jet ski.

“I will only support the candidate who promises to make me a spy. That would be so cool,” Edwards said.

(AFP)

有意角逐白宮大位的兩位民主黨候選人，這個月稍早輪番現身一個喜劇節目；希拉蕊．柯林頓、巴拉克．歐巴馬和之前曾參與角逐的約翰．艾德華全都出現在這個諷刺時事的節目中。

威嚴的希拉蕊在喜劇中心頻道的「柯伯報告」節目當中，修理好一個故障的投影機螢幕。

節目主持人史蒂芬．柯伯驚訝地倒抽一口氣說：「柯林頓參議員，妳真是處變不驚啊。」

希拉蕊說：「我只是喜歡解決問題，有問題隨時打電話找我，即使是在凌晨三點。」這呼應了她之前引起廣泛討論的一則競選廣告，廣告中描繪她能在深夜的白宮接聽緊急電話、處理國家危機。

稍後，柯伯惋惜地說：「我真希望歐巴馬參議員能夠加入我們。」話還沒說完，這位伊利諾州參議員就出現在柯伯播報台上方的投影螢幕中，和他一搭一唱演出。

柯伯不動聲色地說：「歐巴馬參議員，希拉蕊參議員現在會不會後悔幫我們修好這個螢幕？」

歐巴馬接著開始抱怨「粗製濫造的政治干擾」，例如記者會問他為什麼不常別配美國國旗的領扣。

歐巴馬說：「我認為美國民眾厭倦這些把戲了。」

「站在新聞媒體的角度來說，我們還沒有感到厭倦，」柯伯說：「這樣我們就可重複問一樣的問題，不必費心做其他工作了」

另一個突然現身的是之前也參與角逐的約翰．艾德華，當柯伯抱怨沒有人為「白人男性」發聲時，艾德華從幕後走了出來。

柯伯說：「終於，有人出來聆聽美國白人男性的心聲了，這些候選人試圖發表他們會關心的重要政見。」他接著播出希拉蕊喝啤酒、歐巴馬打保齡球，以及共和黨的約翰．麥凱恩大剌剌地打瞌睡的影片。

艾德華表示，他會投給全民健保政策最完善──或是送他一輛水上摩托車的人。

艾德華說：「我只會支持答應讓我當情報員的候選人，當情報員真是太酷了。」

（法新社／翻譯：袁星塵）

Today's Words今日單字 1. satirical adj. 愛挖苦人的 (ai4 wa1 ku3 ren2 de5) 例: The Onion is a very popular satirical newspaper. (《The Onion》是一份非常受歡迎的諷刺性電子報。) 2. malfunctioning adj. 故障的 (gu4 zhang4 de5) 例: Kane has a malfunctioning alarm clock. (肯恩有一個故障的鬧鐘。) 3. lament v.t./v.i. 悲嘆 (bei1 tan4)，惋惜 (wan4 xi2) 例: Andrea laments joining that club. (安德莉亞懊悔加入了那個社團。) 4. advocate v.t. 提倡 (ti2 chang4) 例: Percy got in trouble with the boss because he advocates worker's rights. (佩西因倡導勞工權益而惹惱老闆。)

Say What? 說說看 deadpan 面無表情地 The word deadpan means to express in a matter of fact way. When a person deadpans, he or she shouldn’t smile, grin, seem angry or show too much emotion. For example, “Bill Murray is a master of deadpan humor,” or “Mitch is always smiling. There’s no way that he would be good at deadpan humor.” Deadpan humor is very different from slapstick comedy, which relies on a lot of expression and exaggerated gestures. For example, “Tommy acts like a clown all the time. He’s really into slapstick comedy.” 「deadpan」意指一種事實如此的表達態度；當一個人「deadpan」時，他或她不會微笑、咧嘴大笑、顯露怒氣或是太多情緒。例如：「比爾•墨瑞是個冷面笑匠」或「米契總是面帶笑容，他肯定不是一個冷面笑匠」。 「deadpan humor」和「slapstick comedy」大不相同；「slapstick comedy」需要靠大量表情和誇張的手勢 相輔。例如：「湯米總是表現地像個小丑，他真 的很熱中於搞笑」。

Out Loud 對話練習 Peter: Whom are you going to vote for in the election? Patty: I don’t know. I’d like a strong leader who will stand up for my rights. Peter: The value of that can’t be underestimated. It’s tough to fight battles on your own, especially when you’re not in a position to do so. But you still didn’t say whom you’re going to vote for. Patty: Oh, yeah. I’m going with Obama. The country really needs to go in a new direction, and I think he’s the only candidate capable of doing that. Peter: To each his own. I want Clinton because I like her health care policy. 彼得：這次選舉你會投給誰？ 佩蒂：我不知道，我想要一個會為我的權益挺身而出的領導者。 彼得：這的確是值得考慮的因素，因為爭取自己的權益很難，尤其是不在其位的情況下；但你還是沒有說你要投給誰啊。 佩蒂：噢，對。我要投給歐巴馬，國家真的需要轉型，而我認為他是唯一適任的候選人。 彼得：青菜蘿蔔，各有所好。我會投給希拉蕊，因為我喜歡她的健保政策。 to each his own　青菜蘿蔔，各有所好 The phrase to each his own is a polite way of expressing that you disagree with another person’s opinion but respect his or her right to have a different viewpoint. 「to each his own」這個片語用於委婉表示雖不同意他人看法，但仍尊重對方有不同意見的權利。

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