The British nurse doused in petrol and set on fire by her jilted boyfriend talked to two reporters in London recently about her hopes of rebuilding her life, now that he has been sentenced to at least 14 years in prison.
"I'm not going to give up, I promised myself," said 29-year-old Gabriella Mazalli, who suffered burns to 93 percent of her body. "People said it was just one step forward and maybe two steps back. But I'll just go forward."
Mazzali learned last week that Stephen Rae, 35, had been sentenced in Australia. But her suffering may take on a new dimension because his parents have indicated that he intends to appeal.
Mazzali, 29, who trained at the Royal Free Hospital in London, emigrated to Australia in 1996 and met fellow Briton Rae a year later. The relationship soured and Mazzali ended their friendship, but he returned to administer his own justice.
On Feb. 3, 1998, Rae filled a two-liter milk carton with petrol and made his way to Mazzali's Sydney flat.
Breaking down the door, he doused her in gasoline, reached for his lighter and set her on fire. She was engulfed in flames. As she lay writhing in pain on the ground, he stepped over her and strolled away. Her injuries were so severe that doctors did not expect her to survive.
"I'm not meant to be here," she said. "From my nursing experience I just know that people don't survive with 90 percent burns. I'm sore now, but I'm OK. Friends and other survivors helped me realize I could live a normal life."
Sentencing Rae, Judge Angela Karpin told the Parramatta District Court in Sydney that he had condemned her to a life of pain, disability and disfigurement. Last night Mazzali was still slowly coming to terms with her long-term injuries "most of which will need regular treatment for years."
"To torch somebody is beyond my ability. I mean, to shoot someone is a very quick, sudden thing, but to see someone burning? I just can't comprehend it. I remember every detail," she said.
"There have been times I've wished I was dead, but now I think there must be a reason why I have survived. Finding that reason has kept me going. It's a struggle to cope, but I have to believe something good will come out of this," she said.
After five months and 11 operations, Mazzali has been flown to Britain for further surgery -- the extent of her injuries means she will need constant treatment over the next decade. The only part of her body that escaped injury is her face; she used her hands to cover the flames.
In a statement to the court sentencing Rae, Mazzali said she had been told to wear a pressure suit to aid the healing.
"I sometimes wished my life had ended because of the severe, excruciating pain and the thought of facing a life of disability and permanent scars alone. I would not wish my life on anybody," she said.
Last week, however, Rae's father said his son had been denied justice, and the family would seek an appeal against his sentence.
Speaking from the family home in Crieff, Scotland, James Rae, 64, said his son's only intention was to kill himself.
"Stephen told us that he was talking to Gabriella in the flat when the neighbor appeared, there was some sort of struggle between the neighbour and Stephen, and the petrol went all over the place. Stephen didn't pour it on Gabriella. It went on the carpet and Gabriella fell on it," Rae said.
He added: "As far as the trial is concerned, I think it was a kangaroo court. He was going to be put up without any representation and that's why he pleaded guilty. He was induced to plead that way. He's not guilty of grievous bodily harm with intent. There was no intent."
That is not Mazzali's recollection. She has managed to carry on only because of the help and good wishes of other people, she said.
"People have given me courage, saying `Carry on, Gabriella. We are praying for you, we're here to support you.' It's amazing, it helps me fight on, it really does," she said.
"I've been doing some thinking: what's the point in all this pain? And then the mail will come and it will uplift me with people's kind words," she said.
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