Athletes at Beijing’s Winter Paralympics are not just breaking down sports barriers on the slopes and ice — Argentine skier Enrique Plantey is pushing for a bedroom revolution.
The 39-year-old and his non-disabled Spanish girlfriend, Triana Serfaty, have published a practical guidebook called Sexistimos — a nod to the Spanish term for “we exist” — about disability and sex.
They hope it sparks an open conversation on what is a difficult topic for many.
Photo: AFP
“People are afraid to talk openly about it,” said Plantey, who is a paraplegic.
“The main problem is that many people with a disability think they can no longer have a sex life and give pleasure, and this is not the case,” said Plantey, who came fourth in the giant slalom alpine skiing sitting category.
Some people living with disabilities experience anxiety about sex — such as whether a partner will find them attractive, pain issues, concerns about fertility and a lack of confidence.
For some there are also worries about logistical issues, such as getting from a wheelchair into a bed.
Society often considers people with physical or intellectual disabilities as “non-sexual” — many live in isolation and do not have long-term romantic partners, according to Disabled World, an independent organization that provides health resources.
However, there are signs that attitudes are changing.
The issue broke new ground when Hollywood actress Helen Hunt starred in 2012 film The Sessions, about a polio survivor’s quest to lose his virginity with the help of a sex surrogate.
Dating Web sites specifically for people with disabilities are also helping many find romance.
Plantey, a three-time Paralympian, has used a wheelchair since sustaining a spinal cord injury as an 11-year-old.
Growing up, he lamented a lack of information and resources about how to have a healthy sex life as a young man using a wheelchair.
He uses Viagra, but does not have sensations below his waist.
Nevertheless, he said it was possible to “find sources of pleasure in all parts of the body, not just the genitals.”
Serfaty said it was important couples try to communicate honestly about their practical needs and desires, without fear, judgement or embarrassment.
“This information exists. The problem is that it is often not disseminated,” the 29-year-old said.
Some medical professionals were giving people with disabilities incorrect information about sex function, Serfaty said.
“His doctor had told him he couldn’t have sex,” she said.
“But since he got to know his body, he realized that wasn’t true. You have to see for yourself what you’re capable of. No one can decide for you,” she added.
The couple have turned to tantric sex techniques, and their book and corresponding Instagram account draws on their personal experiences.
Argentina’s flagbearer said the couple’s efforts to promote the topic of sex and disabilities was paying off — generating a lot of interest in the Athletes’ Village in Beijing.
“Many in the Paralympic village come to me to talk about sex and ask questions,” Plantey said.
“Just the other day, someone — I won’t say who — came to find me, in front of my room, to ask me for Viagra,” he laughed.
A fire caused by a burst gas pipe yesterday spread to several homes and sent a fireball soaring into the sky outside Malaysia’s largest city, injuring more than 100 people. The towering inferno near a gas station in Putra Heights outside Kuala Lumpur was visible for kilometers and lasted for several hours. It happened during a public holiday as Muslims, who are the majority in Malaysia, celebrate the second day of Eid al-Fitr. National oil company Petronas said the fire started at one of its gas pipelines at 8:10am and the affected pipeline was later isolated. Disaster management officials said shutting the
DITCH TACTICS: Kenyan officers were on their way to rescue Haitian police stuck in a ditch suspected to have been deliberately dug by Haitian gang members A Kenyan policeman deployed in Haiti has gone missing after violent gangs attacked a group of officers on a rescue mission, a UN-backed multinational security mission said in a statement yesterday. The Kenyan officers on Tuesday were on their way to rescue Haitian police stuck in a ditch “suspected to have been deliberately dug by gangs,” the statement said, adding that “specialized teams have been deployed” to search for the missing officer. Local media outlets in Haiti reported that the officer had been killed and videos of a lifeless man clothed in Kenyan uniform were shared on social media. Gang violence has left
US Vice President J.D. Vance on Friday accused Denmark of not having done enough to protect Greenland, when he visited the strategically placed and resource-rich Danish territory coveted by US President Donald Trump. Vance made his comment during a trip to the Pituffik Space Base in northwestern Greenland, a visit viewed by Copenhagen and Nuuk as a provocation. “Our message to Denmark is very simple: You have not done a good job by the people of Greenland,” Vance told a news conference. “You have under-invested in the people of Greenland, and you have under-invested in the security architecture of this
Japan unveiled a plan on Thursday to evacuate around 120,000 residents and tourists from its southern islets near Taiwan within six days in the event of an “emergency”. The plan was put together as “the security situation surrounding our nation grows severe” and with an “emergency” in mind, the government’s crisis management office said. Exactly what that emergency might be was left unspecified in the plan but it envisages the evacuation of around 120,000 people in five Japanese islets close to Taiwan. China claims Taiwan as part of its territory and has stepped up military pressure in recent years, including
RSS