Last year when her boyfriend broke up with her, Chang Yi-yun (張譯云) embarked upon an emotional rollercoaster of sadness and was eager to get back on an even keel.
Following a friend's suggestion, Chang sought an alternative to getting drunk to ease the pain -- she took a relationship course at the Taipei Family Education Center.
"I learned a lot about love and relationships, and made some good friends there. Most importantly, I got to know myself better," she said.
PHOTO COURTESY OF THE TAIPEI FAMILY EDUCATION CENTER
Upon completion of the nine week course that explored topics including dating, premarital evaluation and family values, Chang realized that she has a tendency to dominate relationships, and learned to appreciate kindness from people that she used to take for granted.
The relationship course, is one of a number of other programs offered at the center, including premarital courses, courses for newlyweds and classes designed for couples who have just become parents.
All are part of the government initiative to promote "healthy relationships, marriage and family values."
The structure of marriage and the definition of what constitutes a family in Taiwan are changing rapidly. Statistics from the Ministry of the Interior's Population Administration Department showed that some 62,000 couples divorced in 2004, more than three times the 1983 figure. Everyday, on average, 172 couples get divorced.
At the same time, men and women are getting married later, with the average age of marriage for men and women advancing to 30.7 and 26.8 years, respectively, up from 28.2 and 24.6 in 1983. The number of marriages slid to from 160,288 in 1983 to 131,453 in 2004.
The birth rate also dropped to a record low of 1.24 per couple last year, prompting grave concern from the government. Seeking to boost family values, the legislature passed the Family Education Law (家庭教育法) in 2003, requiring local governments to offer at least four hours of premarital counseling for people about to get married.
"This is an era of what we call `family diversity.' The definition of a family is more than the traditional combination of a husband, wife and children," director of the center Sophie Yang (楊淑妃) said.
"We respect people's choices, but still hope to maintain traditional family values," she said.
It could be difficult to slow the trend of diversification of family life or relationships by offering nine-week courses in the classroom.
Although Chang benefited from her relationship course, as a 30-year-old single woman, she said she feels no pressure to rush into marriage.
Work priority
"I don't see marriage as a must in my life ? Right now what I care about more is my work, and I am thinking about going back to school," she told the Taipei Times.
Some women's groups panned the family education law as an anti-democratic product to deliberately favor certain images of family or marriage.
"Women do not need to be preached to on how to hold their family together but they do need to be informed of their legal rights when crises occur and they need help," the Woman Awakening Foundation said.
Yet governmental efforts continue and seem to be embraced by increasing numbers. The center's relationship course, which is designed for people who are about to get married, for example, attracts more singles, like Chang, than couples.
"They see it as a chance to meet new friends. We are very happy to provide a safe and educational environment for single people to make friends," course assistant Tang Hou-ting (唐厚婷) told the Taipei Times.
The relationship course attracts about 2,000 participants on average each year. With the increase in cross-cultural marriages and in the numbers of families of Taiwanese businessmen living in China, the center is designing courses for foreign brides and wives of taishang (台商).
"Taishang wives, for example, can experience alot of stress, not only because of the responsibility of taking care of children alone, but because of worries about husbands being unfaithful," Yang said.
Linguistic barriers and differences of culture in cross-cultural marriages, on the other hand, are issues addressed in the course for foreign brides, she said.
Yang said courses at the center are not limited to Taiwanese and foreigners are welcome to attend. For more information about the courses, please call 02-2541-9690.
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