A room with a ruined view
Dear Johnny,
Thanks for the bit about Shih Ming-teh
We've also seen A-bian in Palau (a place I'd like to visit if I could afford it), but is this micro island chase really worth the gas to get there?
The poor decisions made at the end of World War II will only be corrected when Britain and the US face up. I often like to compare Taiwan and Israel, which are two of them.
Bill
Johnny replies: And that's where the comparison between Taiwan and Israel ends, Bill. I think that Chen Shui-bian (
Oh, and Bill, thanks for the nice pictures, buddy. My gal Cathy Pacific is very grateful. Now, how about sending me some of your wife?
Shih Ming-teh's real title
Dear Johnny,
I've noticed a disturbing media trend lately. Ever since Shih Ming-teh came out of seemingly nowhere and got his name into the spotlight, all the media organizations, including the Taipei Times, refer to him by the title, "former Democratic Progressive Party (DPP) chairman." Is this supposed to give some kind of credibility to his current activities? If I'm not mistaken, it's been a good number of years since he was associated with the DPP, right?
My question is, wouldn't it be more accurate to refer to him by his current title? If so, what is his current title? I'm sure you can provide some insight into what title(s) would more accurately reflect his current position in society.
Simon Mitchell
Taipei
Johnny replies: It's standard practice to refer to someone by his most conspicuous achievement if he is no longer a someone, if you get my drift. And while Shih hasn't associated closely with the DPP under the Chen administration, he has found time to do some volunteer work for the Prison Reminiscences Association of Taiwan (PRAT), though few know about this obscure group.
His most prominent achievement, however is his election as chairman of the "My Country Isn't Grateful Enough To Me For Being In Jail For 25 Years So I'm Going To Smear People Who Got Locked Up Trying To Protect Me And Sell Out To My Former Persecutors To Bankroll My Swan Song As A Compulsive Prima Donna" Foundation. Now you know why the media can't run his full title, or even the foundation's abbreviation (MCIGETMFBIJFTFYSIGTSPWGLUTTPMASOTMFPTBMSSAACPDF).
The other question is what Shih himself would like to be known as. This is a challenging question. I'm thinking of running a competition for the best suggestion. The winner will receive something cheap and disposable, or nothing.
Canada needs more scat
Dear Johnny,
I live in a Western country where there are many Mandarin speakers but no overseas edition of the Liberty Times. United Daily News' overseas branch, World Journal, seems to have a vice-like grip on Canadian Chinese-language newspapers. Isn't it time for some change and more variety? After all, there is a limit to how much anti-independence rhetoric I can take.
Aaron Cheong
Richmond
British Columbia, Canada
Johnny replies: There's always the Internet, Aaron. But if that doesn't help, you can strike a blow for Taiwan and steal as many copies of World Journal as possible, then perform a scatological piece of "newspaper performance art" in front of the Chinese embassy. The problem is, if the Liberty Times secures distribution in Canada, will readers endure the shitty speech bubbles in the entertainment section?
What should `TTX' mean?
Dear Johnny,
Just a suggestion from the bowels of Chiayi. One of my gangster friends said: "Hey, they call Los Angeles International Airport `LAX,' so why don't we start calling the new airport in Taoyuan `TTX,' for Taiwan Taoyuan International Airport?"
I kinda think Mr No Fifth Finger had a good idea. "TTX" it is! What say you?
Chiayi Chuck
Johnny replies: It won't sell. "TTX" sounds more like an adults-only edition of the Taipei Times. One with all the stuff that would have got TT's ass nailed by the National Miscommunications Commission -- Filipina maid auditions with Elmer Fung
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