Tosh said she felt lost at the time, especially because Kadeer was only released from a Chinese prison in 2005.
When she asked her mother to stop what she was doing to save her brothers and sister, Kadeer replied: “You are right, but should I choose the 25 million Uighurs or my four children?”
Tosh said that she too has had to deal with the inner conflict the struggle with China has caused.
After experiencing a difficult relationship with her mother for many years, Tosh eventually began to support what her mother was doing about two years ago.
“I saw how Uighurs were treated, especially before and after the Beijing Olympics,” she said.
“Boys and girls are disappearing from schools, some people were randomly shot on streets by cops just because they look Uighur,” she recounted. “These people are walking on the streets of their own country. They have their mothers, brothers, or sisters too.”
“It’s beyond what I can comprehend, I just cannot stand it anymore,” Tosh said.
She said suddenly felt that, though her brothers and sister are still in prison, at least they are still alive and that they will see each other again one day.
Recently, when Kadeer has been feeling frustrated and talked about quitting, it was Tosh who encouraged her.
“I told her: ‘If you don’t [do] it, what happens to Uighurs won’t go [away],’” Tosh said. “I told her it’s not time to back up, just go forward.”
“Somebody’s got to do it, and since my mother has already become an icon in the Uighur movement, her participation would be more effective,” she said.
Since Tosh became more supportive of her mother’s work, she feels that they have grown closer and get along much better.
Although Kadeer appears tough in public, Tosh said she knows her mother loves her children in prison very much, and worries about them all the time.
“She hangs pictures of my imprisoned brothers and sister in her office, so she sees their pictures every day. I’ve seen her looking at the pictures for 10, 15 minutes, and crying,” Tosh said. “I know she blames herself inside, but she knows that she has to continue with what she’s doing.”
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