Sharing the grief

While the grief is still fresh, some residents are urging political activism in the wake of the Newtown tragedy

By Brock Vergakis and Katie Zezima  /  AP, NEWTOWN, Connecticut

Thu, Dec 27, 2012 - Page 12

As residents prepared to observe Christmas less than two weeks after a gunman killed 20 children and six educators at an elementary school, people sharing in the town’s mourning brought offerings of cards, handmade snowflakes and sympathy.

Tiny empty Christmas stockings with the victims’ names on them hung from trees in the neighborhood where the children were shot. On Christmas Eve, residents said they would light luminaries outside their homes in memory of the victims.

“We know that they’ll feel loved. They’ll feel that somebody actually cares,” said Treyvon Smalls, a 15-year-old from a few towns away who arrived at town hall with hundreds of cards and paper snowflakes collected from around the state.

MOURNING

At the Trinity Episcopal Church, less than three kilometers from the school, an overflow crowd of several hundred people attended Christmas Eve services. They were greeted by the sounds of a children’s choir echoing throughout a sanctuary hall that had its walls decorated with green wreaths adorned with red bows.

The church program said flowers were donated in honor of Sandy Hook shooting victims, identified by name or as the “school angels” and “Sandy Hook families.”

The service, which generally took on a celebratory tone, made only a few vague references to the shooting. Pastor Kathie Adams-Shepherd led the congregation in praying “that the joy and consolation of the wonderful counselor might enliven all who are touched by illness, danger, or grief, especially all those families affected by the shootings in Sandy Hook.”

GUN CONTROL

Police say the gunman, Adam Lanza, killed his mother in her bed before his Dec. 14 rampage and committed suicide as he heard officers arriving. Authorities have yet to give a theory about his motive.

While the grief is still fresh, some residents are urging political activism in the wake of the tragedy. A grassroots group called Newtown United has been meeting at the library to talk about issues ranging from gun control, to increasing mental health services to the types of memorials that could be erected for the victims. Some clergy members have said they also intend to push for change.

“We seek not to be the town of tragedy,” said Rabbi Shaul Praver of Congregation Adath Israel. “But, we seek to be the town where all the great changes started.”

Since the shooting, messages similar to the ones delivered Monday have arrived from around the world. People have donated toys, books, money and more. A United Way fund, one of many, has collected US$3 million. People have given nearly US$500,000 to a memorial scholarship fund at the University of Connecticut. On Christmas Day, police from other towns have agreed to work so Newtown officers can have time off.

At Washington’s National Cathedral, the 20 children who were killed also were remembered. Angels made of paper doilies were used to adorn the altar in the children’s chapel. They’ll be displayed there through Jan. 6.

In the center of Newtown’s Sandy Hook section Monday, a steady stream of residents and out-of-towners snapped pictures, lit candles and dropped off children’s gifts at an expansive memorial filled with stuffed animals, poems, flowers, posters and cards.

“All the families who lost those little kids, Christmas will never be the same,” said Philippe Poncet, a Newtown resident originally from France. “Everybody across the world is trying to share the tragedy with our community here.”

CULTURE OF VIOLENCE

Richard Scinto, a deacon at St. Rose of Lima Roman Catholic Church, which was attended by eight children killed in the massacre, said the church’s pastor, Reverend Robert Weiss, used several eulogies this week to tell his congregation to get angry and take action against what some consider is a culture of gun violence in the country.

Praver and Scinto said they are not opposed to hunting or to having police in schools, but both said something must be done to change what has become a culture of violence in the United States.

“These were his mother’s guns,” Scinto said of Lanza. “Why would anyone want an assault rifle as part of a private citizen collection?”

A mediator who worked with Lanza’s parents during their divorce has said Lanza, 20, was diagnosed with Asperger’s syndrome, an autism-like disorder that is not associated with violence. It is not known whether he had other mental health issues. The guns used in the shooting had been purchased legally by his mother, Nancy Lanza, a gun enthusiast.

Gun control and mental health have also been topics at Newtown United meetings, along with what types of memorials would be most appropriate and any other action residents can take to feel like they are doing something.

“We don’t want Newtown to go on the list with Columbine, Tucson and Virginia Tech and only have it associated with horrible acts,” said Lee Shull, who moderated a Newton United meeting just days after the shootings. “We want to turn this into something positive. What can we do?”

A handful of people showed up to the group’s first meeting at the town library two days after the Dec. 14 shooting. The next night, 35 attended, most scrawling ideas and notes on white paper covering the tables. A few days later there was barely room to maneuver around the meeting room when two guests showed up: Senator Richard Blumenthal and Senator-elect Chris Murphy, Connecticut Democrats who told the group they planned to push for gun control legislation and needed their constituents to help them press the issue in Washington.

The group sees itself as a way to spark a local and national dialogue and action in the aftermath of a tragedy. It’s also a way to do something, anything, to cope with the sadness that has settled over Newtown.

Said resident John Neuhall: “Our hearts are broken wide open and we’re here out of grief and out of love for those families.’’