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Taking a walk on the wild side with Offsides

The lads from offsides give thanks for their foot massage. PHOTO: JULES QUARTLY, TAIPEI TIMES

"North America's hottest new hip-hop group" had been taking the tourist trail round Longshan Temple earlier in the week and had wound up at a foot-massage parlor. The promoters needed some shots of the boyz from Offsides for a documentary and decided this was going to be it. They got the owner of the place to play their new DVD and settled in their seats for a rub.

The rest of the clientele were in the midst of deep relaxation and it wasn't until the beats and the rhymes kicked in that they sat up a bit.

His feet warming in water, Malicious -- the freestyle champion of Quebec -- started in with some rapping. Lowkey (who got his feet scraped by the massage guy and was getting pissed at people mistaking him for Michael Jordan) joined in. Bailey, who was the joker of the group, started chopping and waving his hands while rapping. DROne, the DJ, just kicked back and enjoyed getting his feet fondled. He was the ladies' man, that night.

By the time they had finished getting their legs massaged, Offside had made friends and converts. The owner of the place had got them to tag the wall and the girls had all been given autographed CDs.

They check out the shooting range with, from left to right, Bailey, DROne, Malicious and Lowkey. PHOTO: JULES QUARTLY, TAIPEI TIMES

The Vinyl Word had been asked to show the group around town and decided the temple, Snake Alley, some KTVs and old brothels nearby would provide good visuals for the video.

Offsides had arrived two days

earlier in a whirlwind of self-publicity for the release of its debut CD Foul Language, and to help celebrate Club TU's 15th anniversary by playing there for three nights starting yesterday.

Ladies' night. PHOTO: JULES QUARTLY, TAIPEI TIMES

According to Jonathan Wakrat, OdoubleF Records' director of operations in this country and the one who calls Offsides the hottest hip-hop group on the continent that invented it, the band gave up a 10,000-person show with Cypress Hill to be here today. The way he said it, it makes sense to fly in a band on a 35-hour flight from Montreal, Canada, to play TU -- "the oldest hip-hop club in Taiwan and hence at the center of Chinese rap" -- rather than play a big gig in front of thousands with one of the biggest names in the industry.

After the massage it was down the alley and past the macaw, the snakes being skinned, the trinket stores, the sex shops sporting mostly dildos and G-strings (and a realistic jack-in-the-box man who jumps out from the rear window ledge of a car when it's being stolen, supposedly), to the old brothels that mostly service retired Chinese Nationalist Party (KMT) soldiers.

The boyz asked for drinks before we went down the dark and narrow lanes, so we stocked up at a 7-Eleven. Bailey seemed pretty happy about the idea of getting debauched. The others looked pretty tough, but I had the feeling they were nice guys and didn't want to do anything they would later regret.

Wakrat, as ever, was worried about the visuals and didn't know how to bring this off. No worries, Bailey got chatting, Lowkey and DROne got friendly, and soon we were piling into a small little dive and plunging downstairs. It was at this point, reality set in and everybody just wanted to get out. As we left, the madame was shouting prices, which went down from NT$1,500 to NT$500, to "take me free." She eventually got NT$800 from Wakrat just to keep quiet and let us leave.

There was a cockroach fight, various stops for Lowkey to tell people he was not a basketball player, more beer stops,

followed by the temple, which was closed already, so with nothing else to do we talked a little about the band.

Lowkey said he had been rapping for 10 to 12 years and got to know Malicious through being on the scene.

They started a crew in 1995 called Wreakhard with Bailey, who used to run parties and later picked up on DROne, who confirmed his potential by winning some Montreal turntablism contests. His mix of Sweet Child of Mine by Guns 'n' Roses was, they all said, the clincher.

In 1999 they started doing studio work as a group and they have since started their own record label, with licensing deals in various countries. Their first release was Turn it Up in 2001 and they have been working hard since then, releasing a load of 12-inches, compilation CDs, videocassettes and DVDs.

They sound like the real thing and have some fine lines, bumping tunes and smart samples. Their first CD, Foul Language, is a good listen but it's live where they're said to rock and all those years on the Montreal frontlines should be enough to rattle a few bones at TU. Check them out tonight and tomorrow at TU.

There is also scheduled to be an "I'm gonna tell them I'm NOT Michael Jordan" show in Ximending tomorrow afternoon, outside exit 6 of the MRT station, at 2pm.

Elsewhere, it has to be said that MoS is banging in midweek, with crazy prices ($NT$200 for guys before 11pm, free for girls) and big name DJs, such as Hyper, who turned up unnanounced on Wednesday with a lesson in British breakbeats. As for the Jungle Brothers last weekend, there were a few criticisms about the music veering from hip hop to full-on dance and no-one quite knowing what to do about it.

Luxy is currently closed for a refit. The promoter and part owner, Alan Hsia said the ceilings will be higher and there will be more room and more seating for everyone. The new Luxy will reopen in style next week with Derrick Carter steering the wheels of steel on Wednesday, followed by progressive house from the UK's James Zabiela next Friday and DJ Cam on Saturday, a hip-hop DJ from France who is in the mould of Krush and Shadow. "We're going to concentrate less on the top 10 DJs and more on the super DJs," Hsia said.

Finally, Spin will host Breaks Beast 2, with break-beat and drum 'n' bass, featuring DJs Chewie, Umbra and Dry Bean. Tickets cost NT$250.
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