Mormon’s view on gays
Fourteen years ago, I first arrived in Taiwan. I was an eager, young Mormon missionary, all ready to tell Taiwanese about the Gospel of Jesus Christ and the importance of families. I spent two years proselytizing and serving wonderful people in Changhua, Yunlin, Taichung and Hsinchu. However, despite my original intention to change those I met, Taiwan changed me the most.
As an American away from home for the first time, I gradually learned to open my mind and accept different things. I did my best to learn a language, cuisine and culture completely foreign to those with which I had grown up. I had to swallow my pride to realize that many things I thought of as true — whether coming from family, religion or cultural traditions — often changed as I interacted with new people, considered alternative possibilities and encountered unfamiliar experiences.
Now back in Taiwan as a student, I often remember my former, missionary self, and reflect on how the past decade has changed me and my beliefs.
One example is my concept of marriage. As a Christian and a Mormon, I believe God fully approves of marriage and establishing families. Growing up, I believed that this could only mean a heterosexual couple — a mother and father with children. This view ultimately changed just a few years ago after meeting homosexual couples and their families. I saw with my own eyes the goodness, love, beauty of these relationships.
All marriages, straight or gay, can promote patience, kindness, humility, truth, trust and hope. Is it not in society’s best interest to make these benefits available to as many citizens as possible?
Today at a rally in Kaohsiung, a preacher opposed to changing Taiwan’s marriage laws repeated an argument I have heard many times during gay marriage debates in the US — that by changing the law, children would be confused and conflicted. I immediately thought of the thousands of gay children and youth throughout Taiwan and wanted to shout, “No! Gay marriage would not confuse them. You are what’s confusing them!”
Those who pretend gay kids do not exist — that their romantic attraction is unnatural or something they choose later on in life — is what is confusing. These kids exist. Please, please, please — do not deny that. Perhaps they are too young or inexperienced to have realized their romantic orientation. Maybe they are aware, but are not yet prepared to come out. But they exist! They are our children, our grandchildren, our nieces, our nephews, our students, our sisters, our brothers, our classmates, our friends, our neighbors.
By the preacher’s argument, “different” is dangerous and causes confusion. Far greater danger arises from restricting the gay community’s opportunity to love, marry and establish a family. When a gay daughter is constantly told homosexuality is wrong, she begins to believe something is innately wrong with her and suffers long-term emotional damage. When a gay son is pressured to marry a woman to satisfy his parents, infidelity occurs as he looks outside of the marriage to fulfil his desire for romance. When a gay couple is forced to hide their relationship from friends and family, lying, anxiety and painful hiding result.
This oppression of those who love differently only adds to society’s instability. How much depression, loneliness, dangerous sexual behavior, hurt and suicide could be eliminated from our world if we just decided to allow people the choice of whom to love and marry?
Were marriage an option for gay people in Taiwan, not all would take that step, and it may take years for many to prepare themselves for that commitment. Social norms and pressures also would certainly not change overnight. however, for hundreds of thousands of individuals, simply having that option would create more individual freedom as well as hope for a better future — and a more stable, better society as a result.
Sam Noble
Kaohsiung
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