That’s more of an argument for banning scooters than one for allowing US beef. Let’s get to work on getting these death machines off the road, for God’s sake.
But at least one constituency’s tickled pink by Taiwan’s decision, according to the Grand Island Independent: Nebraska beef producers — and the politicians they donate to. Why, these poor fellas have seen all their perfectly good, bone-in beef heartlessly shunned on Taiwan’s shores for nigh on six years.
I mean, what’s a little bovine spongiform encephalopathy (BSE) between friends? And damn, I can’t even pronounce Creutzfeldt–Jakob disease, let alone be terrified by it.
Here’s one politician: “‘Exports remain a critical component to success in agriculture, and this is an important development for Nebraska and all U.S. beef producers,’ said Sen. Mike Johanns, R-Neb. ‘I appreciate the Taiwanese being willing to sit down together and come to this agreement. I look forward to bone-in beef from Nebraska being enjoyed at tables throughout Taiwan.’”
Sit down together? From what I can tell, President Ma didn’t so much as share a beef tonsil with any of his own party’s legislative caucus before charging ahead.
And as for the “Nebraska beef in every pot in Taiwan” dream, well, I think the senator’s head’s gone all funny after too much exposure to chemical fertilizer and manure (the real stuff, and the political kind). Ubiquitous hotpot beef is about as far-fetched as “stinky tofu at tables throughout Nebraska.”
But there’s more work to be done, said Nebraska Senator Ben Nelson: “The government of Taiwan’s decision to drop its ban on 30-month bone-in beef is a welcome next step as we work to eliminate restrictions on beef over 30 months in negotiations to come.”
What, next we’ve got to let in bony geezer beef too?
The paper says the deal allowing imports of bone-in beef from kiddie cattle less than 30 months old will take effect this Monday, pending a “public review” in Taiwan.
That’s a nice way of putting it. The US beef storm has already eclipsed the other scandal of the week, which also involves a US import and which is too depressing even to poke much fun at.
I’m talking about the latest game-fixing scandal to hit the Chinese Professional Baseball League, of course. Eight players named as suspects … including some from the Brother Elephants ... players willingly throwing games for cold cash ...
I’m so upset, I can’t even eat a spinal nerve root.
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