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Letter: A day without smacking

Having a secure and non-violent environment in which to grow up is what we all want for our children. However, physical punishment by parents, teachers or caretakers is usually the first threatening violence children face in their world. Today we observe "No Smacking" Day, a special day initiated in 1998 by EPOCH-USA to bring attention to the need to end physical punishment of children, and to promote non-violent discipline to protect our children from violence and abuse.

Nowadays, there are more and more child-abuse cases being reported in our society. According to research, child abuse often begins with physical punishment being viewed as the only way to discipline children, and is then passed on from one generation to another.

With the concept of "spare the rod and spoil the child," parents might feel they are expected or even obligated to use corporal punishment "when necessary." They also may consider it acceptable as a form of discipline without realizing the negative effects on children.

But what do children really learn from corporal punishment? First of all, through physical punishment, children receive the idea "I am bad, so I deserve to be treated badly" and develop poor self-image and low self-esteem. This keeps children from learning appropriate behavior, and building self-confidence.

Children who have been physically punished also feel that they have "paid" for their misbehavior and tend to misbehave again. They have no opportunity to learn from the real consequences of their misbehavior and may learn to ignore their own responsibilities.

Physical punishment also teaches children that physical violence is an acceptable way of dealing with problems. Parents who use physical punishment set an example of using violence to solve problems or conflicts.

When parents use physical punishment, children are more likely to use violent acts to deal with their conflicts with other people. Therefore, physical punishment not only puts children at risk of physical harm, but also behavioral and interpersonal problems.

No Smacking Day gives us the opportunity to think about what spanking does to our children and society. It encourages parents to learn non-violent and effective ways to discipline children and break the vicious cycle of using corporal punishment from one generation to the next. Non-violent discipline helps children learn problem-solving skills, gain confidence from dealing with problems and become responsible adults.

No Smacking Day is also a day to re-educate our society to respect other people. With non-violent and positive discipline, we teach children to respect others and treat them as individuals who can learn from the natural consequences of their behavior without spanking them. We also need to respect ourselves as parents, teachers and childcare workers, who have the potential to learn new ways to educate children and end violence in our world.

Serene Wei

Garden of Hope Foundation

Taipei

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